Thread: I unironically want to become an ape.

King of Foxes

Penny for your thots
Platforms
  1. PC
  2. PlayStation
Being an ape would be so much better than being a human, just think about it. Apes have no responsibilities, like work, school, and taxes, and are immune to the hellhole that is the internet and technology, so all your time can be devoted to sleeping and chilling with your ape buddies. You can eat bananas (objectively the best fruit) of the highest quality, play tag with your ape friends (even better than human tag because apes are agile and can parkour on trees), and start an ape family with many ape babies (the only babies I wouldn't curbstomp).

Apes are also pretty smart, so you could have a much richer life than most other animals while not being dependent on degenerative human entertainment. Apes can also have fun anywhere — in the wilderness, at the zoo, on the streets, and so on, so you wouldn't have to worry about where you would go. God I want to be an ape so fucking bad, I've already converted to Buddhism and am thinking about what my chances of reincarnating as an ape are, and what I'd do if I don't get reincarnated as one. And if I were you, I would be trying to do the same thing.
 
King of Foxes wants to be an ape.

Mods please ban this furry trash
Not funny I didn't laugh. Your joke is so bad I would have preferred the joke went over my head and you gave up re-telling me the joke. To be honest this is a horrid attempt at trying to get a laugh out of me. Not a chuckle, not a hehe, not even a subtle burst of air out of my esophagus. Science says before you laugh your brain preps your face muscles but I didn't even feel the slightest twitch. 0/10 this joke is so bad I cannot believe anyone legally allowed you to be creative at all.

The amount of brain power you must have put into that joke has the potential to power every house on Earth. Get a personality and learn how to make jokes, read a book. I'm not saying this to be funny I genuinely mean it on how this is just bottom barrel embarrassment at comedy. You've single handedly killed humor and every comedic act on the planet. I'm so disappointed that society has failed as a whole in being able to teach you how to be funny. Honestly if I put in all my power and time to try and make your joke funny it would require Einstein himself to build a device to strap me into so I can be connected to the energy of a billion stars to do it, and even then all that joke would get from people is a subtle scuff. You're lucky I still have the slightest of empathy for you after telling that joke otherwise I would have committed every war crime in the book just to prevent you from attempting any humor ever again.

We should put that joke in text books so future generations can be wary of becoming such an absolute comedic failure. Im disappointed, hurt, and outright offended that my precious time has been wasted in my brain understanding that joke. In the time that took I was planning on helping kids who have been orphaned, but because of that you've wasted my time explaining the obscene integrity of your terrible attempt at comedy. Now those kids are suffering without meals and there's nobody to blame but you.
 
Not funny I didn't laugh. Your joke is so bad I would have preferred the joke went over my head and you gave up re-telling me the joke. To be honest this is a horrid attempt at trying to get a laugh out of me. Not a chuckle, not a hehe, not even a subtle burst of air out of my esophagus. Science says before you laugh your brain preps your face muscles but I didn't even feel the slightest twitch. 0/10 this joke is so bad I cannot believe anyone legally allowed you to be creative at all.

The amount of brain power you must have put into that joke has the potential to power every house on Earth. Get a personality and learn how to make jokes, read a book. I'm not saying this to be funny I genuinely mean it on how this is just bottom barrel embarrassment at comedy. You've single handedly killed humor and every comedic act on the planet. I'm so disappointed that society has failed as a whole in being able to teach you how to be funny. Honestly if I put in all my power and time to try and make your joke funny it would require Einstein himself to build a device to strap me into so I can be connected to the energy of a billion stars to do it, and even then all that joke would get from people is a subtle scuff. You're lucky I still have the slightest of empathy for you after telling that joke otherwise I would have committed every war crime in the book just to prevent you from attempting any humor ever again.

We should put that joke in text books so future generations can be wary of becoming such an absolute comedic failure. Im disappointed, hurt, and outright offended that my precious time has been wasted in my brain understanding that joke. In the time that took I was planning on helping kids who have been orphaned, but because of that you've wasted my time explaining the obscene integrity of your terrible attempt at comedy. Now those kids are suffering without meals and there's nobody to blame but you.
OwO
 
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Being an ape would be so much better than being a human, just think about it. Apes have no responsibilities, like work, school, and taxes, and are immune to the hellhole that is the internet and technology, so all your time can be devoted to sleeping and chilling with your ape buddies. You can eat bananas (objectively the best fruit) of the highest quality, play tag with your ape friends (even better than human tag because apes are agile and can parkour on trees), and start an ape family with many ape babies (the only babies I wouldn't curbstomp).

Apes are also pretty smart, so you could have a much richer life than most other animals while not being dependent on degenerative human entertainment. Apes can also have fun anywhere — in the wilderness, at the zoo, on the streets, and so on, so you wouldn't have to worry about where you would go. God I want to be an ape so fucking bad, I've already converted to Buddhism and am thinking about what my chances of reincarnating as an ape are, and what I'd do if I don't get reincarnated as one. And if I were you, I would be trying to do the same thing.
I like your rationale but you do know that they do not eat bananas in the wild, right? :D